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Jack and the Mouse

I woke up at 4:00 am to hear Mika running rampant downstairs and sliding across the floor in various rooms. I figured that she was chasing a mouse, so I went back to sleep. Sure enough, when I came downstiars in the morning, Mika presented me with the mouse at the bottom of the stairs. I went to fetch a shovel to remove it from the house, meanwhile Jack joined Mika, but failed to notice the mouse.

Slinky Order

 Lanie received a slinky as a birthday party favor, which she played with constantly and then insisted she should take to her friend's house. At her friend's house it was tangled up by his toddler brother. I told her she could replace it, and I would pay for half and she could pay for half with her allowance money.

Vivian and I took Jack out for a walk and left Lanie on Amazon to look at the Slinky choices, of which there are many. A huge downside to being a single mom is the limited amount of time I have to devote to anything unscheduled, particularly on a weeknight, which includes looking for Slinkies. We came back from the walk and she showed me the ones she liked and I ordered one.

A few days later I got a package from Amazon, opened it and found a giant Slinky, not the Slinky I had ordered. When I was alone with Lanie I took it out and asked her where it came from.

"Hmmm..." she replied, "Amazon?"

"Yes," I agreed, "it did. But who ordered it?"

"You?" she asked.

"No, I did not order it. Remember, you were looking at Slinkies when Vivian and I took Jack for a walk. So maybe you ordered it? And you need to tell me if you made a mistake and did."

"Nope. I didn't order it," she told me. 

"Well this is very mysterious," I told her. "You didn't order it, and I didn't order it and here it is."
"OH! I remember now," Lanie said, "Jack ordered it."

"Jack ordered it." I repeated. "That's strange, because Jack was on a walk with me."

"Right," she said pausing. "Then I was looking at the Slinkies and he ran right in and jumped on the iPad and it got ordered!"

"Uh huh." I can't win. I took the rest of her allowance money, (giant Slinkies are expensive) and called it a day. 

Ear Piercing

Vivian has been asking to get her ears pierced for a while, so I finally agreed. Unlike the days when you went to the mall to a Claire's Accessories or kiosk, now it's recommended to go to a tattoo parlor, where there are trained professionals and it's sanitary. So we went to a tattoo parlor, after booking three weeks in advance (who knew?), and got their ears pierced.

Instead of gold or silver studs, there is now a vast array of choices. They decided they wanted their birthstones, which of course Lanie's is a diamond, which I also didn't know.  And cleaning is no longer with rubbing alcohol but with saline spray twice a day. The earrings are also no longer in for 6-8 weeks, but instead for 4 months, with a post-change somewhere in the middle.

Vivian was fine, lying down (not sitting up), on the table and having the needle inserted in each side, it didn't seem to faze her. Although I have a distinct memory of sitting on her for a flu vaccine two years ago to hold her down. 

Lanie was much more affected and was crying and upset. I didn't actually think she'd get them pierced, I just took her because she wanted to go and maybe get it done. After the first one, it was a little touch and go as to whether the other one was actually going to get pierced, but she was determined.

So now Lanie looks like she has earrings to go to a cocktail party on her little 5-year-old ears and Vivian has some cool ones that I would wear.

Jack vs. the Balloon

 Jack was growling at the top of the stairs until Vivian went to investigate. There was a balloon floating in front of the door that I guess he mistook for an intruder. So he refused to come downstairs.

Playdates again

Things to be grateful for, as exhausting and chaotic and crazy as it is. The kids can have playdates again and the house is crowded and messy and insane, or maybe it's always like that, but it's good. Having to move backpacks and shoes and getting asked a million weird things and having to relocate the dog, but it feels so much more normal than the past few pandemic years.

The highlights of the 8 or 9 kids here on Friday were questions such as: 

"Did you know if you stab yourself in the stomach with a knife, you shouldn't remove it yourself?" (I did not).

"Bethan, can you get Lanie? She's stuck on the top of the fence."

And exclamations such as, "Glitter emergency! Open the door, get it outside now!" Directly after I thought it was a good idea to vacuum the popcorn up that had been trailed across the floor, silly, silly idea. 

And obviously when two of the parents arrived their children were in the treehouse eating tortilla chips and I was looking for Lanie who I hadn't seen or heard in a while.

On the plus side, Sam and his friend were upstairs and I didn't get a chance to check on them. Turns out they were making a video that is different than their usual crazy stuff.

Book Character Day

Book Character Day at Lanie's school for Read Across America Day, I got emails about it, put it in the calendar and obviously forgot until the night before, when Lanie was not at her best. She was supposed to wear a costume to show that she was a character from a book, that she also had to bring into school with her.

Everything Vivian and I suggested she dress up as, was immediately rejected. Such as:

"You could be Eloise, from the Eloise series." 

"NO."

From there it went downhill until we figured out the pattern. I instructed her to go into the dining room and "find a book with a character" that she could dress as.

So she did.

So I told her she would be "too cold," and pulled a pile of books that she could choose from. We read two books and then she went upstairs to "read them again," and I found her like this at 5:00 PM.

So Vivian and I put together some more acceptable choices (Vivian also wanted to have her hair curled, naturally at this point, which was 8:30 PM).

A bunny (the only book that exists in our house with a white bunny is about an Easter bunny).

Olivia the Pig, so cute, my first choice.

Ninja Red Riding Hood.

Sam's job was to talk her into wearing one of the outfits at that we had created, in the morning, so that I didn't have to make a new costume before school and work.

So I sent her to school dressed like an Easter Bunny for Book Character Day. I mean it's fictional. And better than Wonder Woman, in March, in Kindergarten.

Sam's job was to talk her into wearing one of the choices in the morning so that we didn't have to create a new costume in the morning. 

So I sent an Easter Bunny to school for Book Character day. 

Live and Learn: The Baseboard Heaters

After having a plumber in, again, for various things, he asked offhandedly, "why my heaters were closed in the bathroom? and didn't I want the heat on in there?" It had been very cold in the bathroom. It turns out that the baseboard heaters had mostly been off. For five years. 

So now they are open and on.

Closed and Off.

Open and On.

And now I know.

When Jack gets Stuck

 Jack sometimes gets "stuck" in the bathroom, or thinks he does (the door doesn't actually latch). If he is scratching at the door, Mika will come and open it for him.

Jack and the Box

After Sam was told multiple times to clean up the Cheeze It box, Jack found it and decided to eat the leftovers. Of course, Sam filmed it before rescuing him and then set it to music.

Covid Days

 We avoided it for about two years, so I guess it was time, despite taking precautions and restricting activities. Luckily it seems we contracted Omnicron, from Vivian's school. So it's not terrible, more like being hit by a small vehicle rather than a large bus.

The girls and I have it, all with different sets of symptoms. The common symptoms seem to be sore throats and headaches and grumpiness. The grumpiness could also be being stuck in the house for days in frigid temperatures, so even walking isn't pleasant. We've gotten out a little bit and I kicked them outside once and they found a dead, decomposing squirrel in the treehouse, and tried to rollerblade and scooter down a snow mound, which go figure, does not work. 

In other news, Lanie's stuffed unicorn aptly named Marshmallow, gave birth to a stuffed platypus, and has had several walks around the block in strollers (the unicorn-not the baby or Lanie). Jack has had company all week which he is enjoying and has also had several walks around the block. We have consumed mass amounts of popsicles and tea and logged lots of screen time. Vivian has also rearranged her room twice and written a few stories. Lanie has been showing us many, many "tricks" and when her fever and high and she is particularly grumpy, usually around 4:00 pm, she beats people with stuffed animals or throws random objects at us. Then she goes upstairs and falls asleep in an undisclosed location.

They've also been practicing their music which has been nice and doing some coloring in between arguments and such.

Sam was the only one who consistently tested negative so he went to his dad's for a few days to watch football and hang out with the dogs there. 

One would think it would be timely after having Christmas that they would use their Christmas presents, but the only presents they have been really using are art supplies. Luckily GrandJoe did put a swing in the basement and we hung the rings back up in the doorway on the first floor so they have been able to use and argue about those. 

Reading James and the Giant Peach.

Marshmallow having a walk.

Snowbank rollerblading.

Lanie talking to Nana and GrandJoe on Facetime.

Viv's cake before she tested positive but was sick.

Pediatrician Appointment

 Taking the girl's to their annual physical, which were scheduled together to save me a trip. Which is super helpful when they decide to be naughty together. 

Lanie as we wait for the doctor,"you know what would be a good idea? To hide from the doctor and pretend we're not here."

Vivian, "yes!"

They jump off the table and hide despite multiple requests for them to get up. The pediatrican actually walked in and said, "are they here?"

Text Message

Always good to know what my kids are up to. Interestingly we have an actual (mostly finished) treehouse that Chris built last year during lockdown. But apparently the neighbor's tree is more interesting.

 

Pet Update

Other than the demise of the guinea pigs, Jack and Mika have kept things interesting. Jack escapes from the house less and barks a little less due to a new collar. However, she has decided not to use her litter box and for a while only used the bathroom in various potted plants. 
Now the indoor potted plants have stones and orange peels in them to deter her. Which works. So she has decided to use the entire basement in nooks, crannies, and crawl spaces to relieve herself. So the entire basement reeks. 

I finally addressed it with the vet who suggested prescription cat food only to determine whether its a gastrointestinal issue. Meanwhile she eats more of Jack's food than he does. So that has to get put out of the way if she gets into it.

No more Fancy Feast for this one.

Fancy new litter box that offered privacy, but did not solve the problem.

Easter

 Easter this year: 

Cool kids in their sunglasses, egg hunts, in all a good and not-too sugar-fueled day. We got to do two egg hunts, one here at the house and a second one at Nana and Grand Joe's. 

Sadly, it ended with the news of the second guinea pig dying. Piggie Pig, later know as Disco Steve, passed away. He was recently relocated to their Dad's apartment when I broke my hand and couldn't take care of him. Chris had to come and dig a hole as I realized that I couldn't do that with a healing hand. Vivian decorated his headstone and he was quickly buried as I realized I had a new sitter starting the next day and couldn't quite leave a dead pet for her to help bury.

In the Kitchen

 The kids went away with Chris and came back with a freshly laid egg. Which I didn't know about right away. When I discovered it (Vivian tearing into the kitchen at top speed, yelling, "it's cracked! I think it's hatching!"), we set up a spot for it, where I can keep an eye on it.

After a few texts to my brother who has actually raised chickens, it's doubtful it will hatch. Which is fine, since I really don't need a chicken, or duck, or goose, because they are all possibilities. 

The unclear part is what happened to the eggs that Lanie and Sam had, but I don't think they ever even made it to the car, so I'm not worry about them.

Clogged Toilets and Divorce

So Chris and I are getting divorced. It's been a long time coming, accelerated in some ways like everything probably, by Covid and the quarantine. Obviously it's not where I want to be, or how I want my kids to be raised, and is not an easy conclusion to come to, but here we are.

It's been a hard year and I'm now going at it solo, at least for the time being. Emotions have been running high, the kids are all handling things differently, between personalities and ages. Being in a place where they can only socialize minimally has made it more isolating and a lot more challenging. Sam has his friends more, as they are older and local, and independent in different ways. Vivian switched schools in September, to be in person as oppose to mostly remonte, and it has been a lot of changes for a little girl. Lanie is steadfast but needs reassurance and is figuring it out. She told me yesterday I couldn't have anymore birthdays because she needed me to never die (but that's a secret). 

We've all, meaning the kids, myself, and three animals, been plugging along trying to maintain. Mostly things seems reasonable and calm, and then all hell breaks loose. We've done lots of meltdowns, some hiding, a minor sledding accident, losing my keys, losing a kid here and there, even managed to poke Vivian's eye with the Christmas tree while taking it down. Or when Santa tried to enter Vivian's window on Christmas Eve, when a wild windstorm actually blew the top sash down, and I didn't notice for 3 days. Even after Vivian wouldn't sleep in her room because it was "too rattlely." We've done vet appointments, kid infections, and lots of corresponding with teachers. Mostly they've been super awesome at clogging toilets. Like every few days. Because really, I guess it's not a good bathroom experience unless you clog a toilet. Just for the record, baking soda and vinegar are purportedly helpful in breaking down human feces, but a plunger is really just more effective and efficient. The amount of toilet paper is also starting to get rationed, because I am also no longer pulling wads out.

 It's been a ride.

Thankfully my parents and sister have been around for emergencies and non-emergencies alike. For continuity, normalcy, and always food, and for the children, and some home repairs.

Basically what I've come to conclude is that this experience is kind of like a clogged toilet. Unpredictable and messy and really crappy. It's also taught me how amazing my kids and family are.  And how the children are little human beings who need their family in whatever shape or form that is, and how our blessings come in many ways. 

What Keeps me Going

 It's been a rough run, but these kids keep me going. Thank god for their sense of humor and for being able to turn around and catch the silly things in between the fights, laundry, cleaning and all the emotions.

The butt they made on the coffee maker.

Vivian's sponteaneous robot costume that she couldn't actually walk in.

All of Lanie's naps in various places.

When I can't actually get to Lanie because they've created a fort that I am not allowed to pass.

Lanie Found My Phone

 Always fun to see what the kids get up to when they find my phone.

Rockport Vacation

My parents took us to Rockport for a week. Here are some photos:

   

Sam and Vivian made up a "rate the driver game" upon arrival. It kept them well occupied.

They noticed the speed sign well before I did.

Sunsets.

Statue at Halibut State Park.

Auntie at Halibut State Park.

Reminder that all is not normal, the mask hook.

Misty morning at the beach.

Just "act normal, smile regular" photo.